had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Randomize
