Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Randomize
