2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
