are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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