Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
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