Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
