Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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