Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
But break dance skills will only take you so far
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Randomize
