is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
