But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
No subtext here. People are naked.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Randomize
