rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
and she was petting her beer can
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
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