Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
