I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
