my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
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