do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
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