In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
She just used a chaser for red wine.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
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