Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
