Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
