I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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