i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize
