from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
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