don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
