so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
