Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
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