It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
