Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
