He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Randomize
