Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
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