So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Dear god my vagina.
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