YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
