If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
