If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Randomize
