He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Randomize
