he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
