whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Randomize
