i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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