I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize
