Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Randomize
