ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
