We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
