This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Randomize
