She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Randomize
