i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
