just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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