I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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