you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
