Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Randomize
