Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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