first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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