what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Randomize
